After the half marathon I wasn’t sure how quickly I would hop back on the work out bandwagon. Well it was one day, go me. Sunday was a funday and Monday I was back to business. The row of blisters on my foot wasn’t going to allow me to run, and lets be honest I had no desire to be running, so I decided to take a trip to the gym. I think it has been a solid month or more since I have actually been to the gym to lift, bad Megan. I got in a pretty great core and shoulder / chest work out. My arms were pretty shaky when I was trying to wash my hair post work out, it was a slight nuisance but that must mean that I got a good lift in! Now that that is out of the way I want to get to a non food and non work out topic, get excited…
Falling in love with yourself. It sounds easy enough right? How many times have you been swept away by some one and thought they were amazing? It didn’t seem tough did it? But doing that with yourself… that can be more difficult if you let your head get in the way of things. My journey to really loving myself started when I began running a lot in February. I was gearing up for my first race and spending a lot of quality time alone logging miles. While you can listen to music surely your mind is bound to wander. I would occasionally think how awesome my body was for doing all this running and how proud I was of myself for running 6, 8, 10 miles at a time. It would make me think about all the things I could probably test my body with and see how victorious I could be. Let’s be honest here, a race is the sweet reward that you get from all the intense training you put in, its the pat on the back saying “great job, you are amazing”. Along with the running I decided to start being more selfish and caring more about my own happiness than every one around me and doing things that sometimes just benefitted me and no one else. Not that I would be mean or anything but just being selfish instead of selfless. When you start making me time all the other time seems better and your confidence will sore. Today for example, I camped out (still am here actually) on my balcony. I busted out the computer recently since the sun went down but I was just sitting, enjoying the noises of the hustle and the bustle and appreciating how gorgeous the sky looks close to sunset.
There is something serene that happens when you can be alone and just let your mind wander. Nothing negative comes to mind I promise, its not a pity party where all the places you fall short in life will come into clarity, its a blankness and its calming and wonderful. The URL for this blog is wildly long and it bothers me sometimes BUT it really has a meaning and looking back at the first post I ever wrote I am happy to say that I am well on the way to meeting every single one of those goals and objectives.
Another part of loving me was finding all of my friends who were supportive and amazing. When I first moved to DC in August of 2010 I didn’t know any one but my boyfriend and his roommates because they were all from our home town. This made for a tough social life at first and my job doesn’t have any one within 5 years of myself and only 4 other women in the company who I never see. So it was lonely for sure. I think that definitely contributed to the weight gain because I wasn’t happy with life. I didn’t have a life outside of my boyfriend and I think thats a huge mistake couples make, losing their personal identity in a relationship. I have truly not said no to any invitation to do anything in the last few weeks and its crazy how busy life can get when you let it happen. I have some of the best friends in the world right now and I seriously adore each and every one of them for how different they are and everything they bring to the table. When you are open to it, making friends is not very hard at all. For example, yesterday we were at the pool playing corn hole and hanging out for the day and I started up a conversation with a group of people that were grilling near us and ended up exchanging numbers with a few people and now they are coming to Top Golf (way cool right??) with us tomorrow. It’s seriously amazing what can happen when you are just open to anything and everything. I have become quite the pick up artist with the ladies lately and try to make a new friend every night I’m out, I have gotten quite successful too and my network of friends is expanding like crazy.
Now the question is could I have done this two years ago when I just moved here? No. I wasn’t happy with myself, I didn’t love myself unconditionally. Being able to say I am proud of who I am and that I just like me and all the weirdness and quirks that involve being me shows me how much I have grown in the last year and a half. We all make mistakes, we all fall down, we all do silly things in public from time to time and we all have the ability to grow from each and every experience. I promise you that taking some time for self reflection and figuring out what makes you happy and just doing it will be life changing.
Alright enough from me, if you have actually read this entire thing thank you : )
Have you found that running brought you closer to yourself? Is there anything else in your life that made you change into caring for yourself more?